In the Chaos

A chaotic silence has taken my words away.I sway in the windTrying to forget the words you once said.I was guilty Of thinking happy thoughts in this silent moment  Forgive me The words dance on my tongue but refusing to take flightWords rush forthOnly to be stopped in their tracks  Hush nowThe words still hurtWhere do I…

Numb

He said he loved me todayAnd like the days beforeYou could see the joy on his faceDelicate pride lost in a moment of certainty And I felt…NothingNo heart beatsNo angels singing Just whispers of what should be there.The joy of the passed me byAnd like a thought caught on a child’s imagination, gone. He told…

Oh Beloved

Warm hugs Harmonious love No goodbyes These are the things I seek when I close my eyes When the wind blows late at night And the birds stop their singing In your arms as all tears fall I am too shy to ask My heart beats too loud to deny The simple truths My desire…

Intrusive Thoughts

I have lost myself to the unknownDrowning in my sorrowAloneOnce moreMisery was supposed to be my companion Yet here I sitLegs crossedAbandonedAnd alone Such a cruel worldMark my words Intrusive thoughts know no bounds 

The Guilt

The guilt sets inIt’s my fault reallyI should have leftWhen he told me to hold my breathAnd the walls became his enemy I should have leftWhen he said it was nothingAnd the bottle became his friend I was guilty tooIt was my faultShe died protecting me And now I am guilty too momWhen dad quit…

Saturday Thoughts

I wrestle with my own mortality. Lost between the coming and going. My brain is in disarray and I find it hard to concentrate. It’s the depression. I wear it like a second skin now Close to my heart. I want to tell you something different this time I want to say that the medication…

Splendid

Thoughts of splendor wrestle with my mind And for the first time today I am happy It creeps in like a vine This happiness of mine Simply delirious I run To the hills and beyond By the the time I have caught my breath I am laughing Shouting for Joy And all those who love…

The Dismount

It slips in like a silent sinPretending to hold the powerDesire rises on ill-forgotten promises And I am no more than a numberLined across your bedForgive me if you lost countI’ll beg your pardon in my dismount Your sweet words did not gain you consent In a world where the illusion is greater Than the mass I…

SHHHHH

“Shhhhhh” he utteredNo more talking to the wallsMake love tonight Under the starsBeyond the valleyLet my body remember yours Before the sun risesAnd we must remember our promises Shhhhh No more talkingLips need no words when love speaks so loudly

Fight Back

I am weak to mental attacks Who do your hurt when there is not one around Voices in my head Cracking Under the pressure of ill-content How do I fight back Where do I run to When I am my own enemy Self-doubt sets in And I am no longer in the running To win…